The Number 2 Job
Tushy, a bidet company is looking for a new employee who isn’t too shy to share their bathroom habits, more specially, number two.
The job will last at least three months and pays $10,000; all you have to do is poop every day and keep records.
If you’re curious, check out the details below. They wrote them, they are clever. To apply click here.
Fecescription
TUSHY is looking for our first VP of Fecal Matters to ASSist in the day to day op-poo-rations of our #Bidet2020 campaign. With guidance from our Chief Pooping Officer, Dr. Mark Hyman, our new VP of Fecal Matters will be testing and studying their own pooping habits and documenting it via TUSHY’s social media. This will be a three-month, fart-time, $10,000 contract role requiring about 30-60 minutes per day (depending on how many times you poop!) to poop and document your experience.
Qualifications
- A real pooping human with 21-121 years of pooping experience
- Pungent poop-related communication skills
- Possess incredible precision-spraying skills
- Strong poo-ject management and skills
- Solid… or loose knowledge of the Bristol Stool Chart
- Ability to prioritize in complex, fast-paced, *or constipated* environments
- Embraces an “open-door policy” when discussing what happens in the bathroom
- Ability to install the TUSHY bidet on a standard toilet
Job Funk-tions
- Minimum 90-day commitment to the bidet life
- ANALyzing and documenting your own daily pooping habits
- Interview those closest to you about pooping habits
- Testing TUSHY products against other bathroom products and brands
- Pro-deuce video content for social media
- Testing and debunking myths surrounding gut and butt health
- A lot of pooping
