Detroit’s Wildest Pickup Truck Load: A Giraffe Takes A Final Ride
Before we get to the giraffe. Look, Detroit has seen some things. We’ve seen a guy grilling hot dogs on a lawnmower in rush hour traffic. We’ve seen a whole…
Sergey-AND-Marina/ Getty Images
Sergey-AND-Marina/ Getty ImagesBefore we get to the giraffe. Look, Detroit has seen some things. We’ve seen a guy grilling hot dogs on a lawnmower in rush hour traffic. We’ve seen a whole couch tied to the roof of a Chevy Cavalier with nothing but hope and duct tape. But a giraffe in the back of a Ford pickup? Now that was new.
Scotty HallNOT the giraffe in the back of the truck
It all started when a Metro Detroit driver spotted the unmistakable silhouette of a giraffe sprawled in the bed of a truck cruising through Macomb County. Naturally, the internet did what it does best—freaked out.
Some people thought it was a bizarre art piece. Others assumed it was an elaborate Halloween decoration that got lost on the way to a Spirit store. And then, of course, there were the Toys R Us jokes. ("RIP Geoffrey, you deserved better.")
But no, this wasn’t some elaborate hoax. This was real. And it belonged to Darren Wehner, a taxidermist, big-game hunter, and the proud owner of a nine-month-old pet kangaroo named Atlas.
Yes, a man who turns wild animals into museum pieces also happens to carry around a baby kangaroo like a living fanny pack. But back to the giraffe.
So let's talk about it
Once the initial shock wore off, Wehner explained to FOX 2 that the giraffe had died naturally at a zoo of old age. No foul play, no dramatic Hollywood poaching scene—just an elderly giraffe who had seen one too many winters.
Wehner had been commissioned to preserve it for a museum, because apparently, when you’re a world-class taxidermist, your to-do list includes "Mount a giraffe" right between "Pick up dry cleaning" and "Feed the kangaroo."
"When we receive it, it's no different than leather. It's just leather with hair on it," Wehner said. Which, sure, if you’re a taxidermist, that logic makes sense. If you’re anyone else? That’s an extremely unsettling way to describe a giraffe.
The Aftermath
Of course, Detroiters had questions.
- Couldn’t you have put it in something a little less… visible? Like, I don’t know, a trailer? A U-Haul? Maybe just a slightly taller truck bed so its legs weren’t sticking out like a crime scene?
- How did traffic react? Were people cutting off semi-trucks just to get a better look? Did someone in a Dodge Charger race the truck to see if they could beat the giraffe?
- Did anyone call the zoo? You just know there was at least one overly enthusiastic animal lover on the phone with the Detroit Zoo, screaming, "I FOUND YOUR GIRAFFE!"
At the end of the day, Marvin the Giraffe (RIP) got where he needed to go, Wehner went back to doing whatever it is taxidermists do in their free time (probably something involving more exotic animals), and Detroit added yet another legendary sighting to its growing list of things that should not be but somehow are.
Because in this city, you never really know what you’re going to see on the road.
And let’s be honest—if there was going to be a place where a giraffe got its last ride in the back of a Ford, it was always going to be Detroit.
