We Don’t Deserve Dogs… But We Do Serve Them Like Royalty

Let’s face it—we don’t just love our dogs. We worship them. We sing to them. We hand-mix their meals like we’re auditioning for Top Chef: Canine Edition. And during National Pet Week, a new poll reminds us just how far we’ll go to make sure our furry best friends are living their best lives... especially at dinner time.

Gone are the days of scooping kibble into a scratched-up metal bowl and calling it a day. Nope. That’s the culinary equivalent of a drive-thru burger, and frankly, our pups deserve filet mignon (or at least a warmed-up beef topper with some bone broth drizzle).

According to a recent survey, 44% of dog owners say they’ve got at least one meal-time ritual—and some of them are hilariously extra. Let’s take a look at how deep this doggy devotion really goes:

It starts with tradition. Nearly half (48%) of dog owners say they always put food in a specific dish or place—because nothing says “love” like knowing your Labrador prefers the blue ceramic bowl over the stainless steel one that “makes his ears echo.”

Then there’s the gourmet flair. 38% of us add special ingredients like chicken broth, toppers, or that bougie “freeze-dried wild boar” packet that costs more per ounce than our own dinner. And 30% take it even further by hand-mixing the meal to make it more “appetizing”—as if Fido might send it back for lack of seasoning.

Feeding time becomes a full performance in some homes. 22% of owners say a special phrase before feeding their pup, because apparently, “Who wants num-nums?!” is now a sacred chant. And 20% offer a treat appetizer—as if our dogs just got seated at a five-star restaurant.

But wait, there’s more: 16% of people actually plate the food like a gourmet dish, while 15% heat it to a specific temperature (we assume that’s Fahrenheit, not Kelvin, though the science might be similar).

14% set the table and eat together, because nothing brings a family closer than chewing in unison. And 12% let their pup "choose" their meal from a few options—probably hoping their dog picks the $4 scoop instead of the $12 grain-free elk bites.

Let’s not forget the utensils (12% use designated spoons and forks), the theme songs (9% sing), and—yes—dinner dances (9% bust a move alongside their dogs). If you're imagining someone spinning their schnauzer while chanting "It's chow time, baby!"—you're not wrong.

And here’s the stat that proves dogs have trained us, not the other way around: 70% of owners say if they're even a minute late with dinner, their dog lets them know. Loudly. With side-eye, pacing, or sitting directly in front of the TV like a furry protestor demanding justice. Hell, even Bill Burr knows about dogs acting crazy.

We love our dogs because they love us without judgment. But also, because they’re weird, funny, and full of personality. And clearly, they’ve convinced us that dinner isn't dinner without a sprinkle of theatrics.

So if you’re plating your dog’s dinner like it’s a tasting menu at Le Bark Bleu, just know you’re not alone. You’re just one of millions of humans who believe that when it comes to man’s best friend... nothing is too much.

Now go sing that kibble ballad loud and proud.