Last-Minute Halloween Costumes That’ll Keep You from Being the “Boo-Hind the Eight Ball”
If you’re reading this while holding a bag of mini Snickers and wondering what to wear tonight, congratulations—you’re officially behind the eight ball. Which, honestly, could BE your costume. Just…
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If you’re reading this while holding a bag of mini Snickers and wondering what to wear tonight, congratulations—you’re officially behind the eight ball. Which, honestly, could BE your costume. Just wear black, slap a white paper “8” on your chest, and call it performance art. You’re welcome.
Because yes, for most neighborhoods in America, trick-or-treating goes down tonight. And while the planners have had their outfits hanging on a closet door since Labor Day, the rest of us are scouring Amazon for next-day delivery and considering whether we can pull off “guy who forgot Halloween was today.”
Fortunately, the National Retail Federation (NRF) has dropped their annual list of Top Halloween Costumes for 2025—and it’s basically a cheat sheet for what everyone else is wearing. So if you want to blend in, we’ve got you. If you want to stand out, we’ve got a few last-minute, Big Jim-approved curveballs too.
Top 10 Costumes for Kids: The “Tiny Terror” Power Rankings
- Spider-Man – Still your friendly neighborhood spider-kid. Miles Morales and Peter Parker remain undefeated because spandex and sugar rushes just go together.
- Princess – Eternal classic. If your daughter says “I’m a princess,” don’t overthink it. You can literally put her in any sparkly dress and she’s royalty. Bonus points if Dad shows up as the carriage Uber driver.
- Witch – Easy, timeless, and perfect for when you realize you’ve run out of face paint and creativity. A broom and attitude go a long way.
- Ghost – Simple, spooky, and laundry-dependent. (Pro tip: Cut holes in the bottom of an old sheet and tell everyone you’re a ghost that gave up halfway through haunting season.)
- Superhero (generic) – Translation: “Mom couldn’t find the right cape.” Still works.
- Batman – The Bat signal is apparently visible from every Target in America.
- Superman – Because tights and a cape are the kid equivalent of feeling invincible.
- Wednesday Addams – Still reigning as the queen of deadpan. One smirk, one braid, and you’ve nailed it.
- KPop Demon Hunters – A newcomer cracking the Top 10, based on the movie of the same name. If your kid is wearing bright colors, wielding a glowing prop sword, and singing about demons—just smile and nod. They’re “on trend.”
- Vampire – Always in style. Just maybe skip the fake blood if your kid’s costume doubles as their church outfit.
Top 10 Costumes for Adults: The “Trick-or-Tequila” List
- Witch – It’s basically the yoga pants of Halloween costumes.
- Vampire – You get to wear black, look mysterious, and justify your resting “I’m over this” face.
- Pirate – Because “arrrr” sounds cooler than “I didn’t do laundry.”
- Cat or Batman (tie) – Someone at the NRF really phoned this one in. But hey, “Catwoman” solves both. Add ears and confidence issues—you’re golden.
- Superman – Still flying high. (Although at most adult parties, it’s more “Superman who forgot his cape in the Uber.”)
- Ghost – Cheap, easy, and good for introverts who want to say hi without being seen.
- The Addams Family – A whole group costume that says “We coordinated,” which means one person did all the work and the rest just showed up.
- Zombie – Makeup optional if you’ve got a toddler.
- Princess – You laugh, but grown women are reclaiming their tiaras. And good for them.
- Star Wars – Because you can’t go wrong with a galaxy far, far away. Just maybe skip the lightsaber duel in your neighbor’s driveway.
Top 10 Pet Costumes: Because Why Should Humans Have All the Humiliation?
- Pumpkin – Classic, round, and adorable.
- Hot Dog – The world’s most literal pun. Also, we’ve reached the point where costume manufacturers should have to specify food hot dog vs. weird sexy hot dog.
- Bumble Bee – Because nothing says “sting of regret” like dressing your dog in yellow stripes.
- Ghost/Superhero (tie) – Either way, they’ll look confused and mildly betrayed.
- Bat – Bonus points if you call them “Bark Knight.”
- Dog – Yes, this is real. If your dog goes as a dog, you’ve officially achieved the “I’m not doing this” costume level.
- Witch – Works best if your pet already has a naturally judgmental expression.
- Spider – Always hilarious, always ends with your pet trying to bite off one of its fake legs.
- Batman – Because even your pug can fight crime. Slowly.
- Cat – If your cat dresses as a cat, congratulations—you own an anarchist.
Fun fact: One in six people believe their pets enjoy dressing up for Halloween. Which is fascinating, because one in six people are also very wrong.
Big Jim’s Last-Minute Costume Hacks
If all else fails, go conceptual. That’s where the comedy lives.
- “Behind the Eight Ball” – Wear black, tape a paper “8” on your shirt, and carry a small bottle of regret.
- “404 Costume Not Found” – Write it on a plain T-shirt and look annoyed.
- “Freudian Slip” – Label yourself “Mommy Issues.” Works best if you’re wearing an actual slip (or bravery).
- “Ghosted” – Carry your phone, stare at it sadly, and tell people, “She never texted back.”
- “Michigan Construction Zone” – Reflective vest, orange cones, and move really slow. Terrifyingly accurate.
The Final Bite of Candy Corn
Whether you’re rocking a $200 costume or wrapping yourself in aluminum foil to become “leftover burrito,” Halloween isn’t about perfection—it’s about participation. Grab a pillowcase, throw on whatever costume makes you laugh (or at least won’t get you arrested), and enjoy the one night a year when adults, kids, and dogs all get to act equally ridiculous.
Just remember: if your “sexy vampire” outfit makes you cold, your “lazy ghost” costume’s slipping off, and your “Batdog” refuses to walk, congratulations—you’re doing Halloween exactly right.
