Tunnel Buddies: The Shared Partners of Rock Music

Tunnel buddies. The term generally refers to two people who have been romantically involved with the same partner. It speaks to something that has always been true in music history: the scene is small, the circles overlap, and the same names keep popping up backstage. Shared partners are just a part of the dance.

The slang phrase "tunnel buddies" and the less socially acceptable "Eskimo brothers" (also see "homie hoppin") equate to the same concept. It is often used humorously to describe shared romantic history between men or women. In the rock world, where tours ran for months, managers overlapped, and L.A., London, and New York scenes were tight-knit, the odds of “shared partners” went up dramatically.

Instead of the "Who's Who" of Rock, this is more "Who Slept with Who that You Knew." Phew.

Aerosmith’s Steven Tyler and a slew of other famous rockers were romantically linked to model and singer Bebe Buell in the 1970s. Buell’s relationship with Tyler resulted in the birth of actress Liv Tyler, although she was initially raised believing Todd Rundgren was her father. Buell has written openly about her relationships in her memoir Rebel Heart, and her romantic history reads like a roll call of classic rock royalty.

George Harrison and Ringo Starr weren’t just Beatles bandmates. They were connected through a complicated chapter involving Maureen Starkey, Ringo’s first wife. Harrison reportedly had an affair with Maureen (and others) in the mid-1970s, something that has been acknowledged in various Beatles biographies. Patti Boyde, Harrison's wife at the time, was having an affair with Eric Clapton. Patti ended up filing for divorce, listing George's infidelity as the reason.

Few rock feuds were as icy as the tension between Johnny and Joey Ramone. The root of much of it traces back to Linda Daniele, who dated Joey before marrying Johnny. I would like to think that The Ramones would have found the term. tunnel buddies, humorous, but I guess it can be funnier when you're talking about someone else. The situation created a permanent rift between the two Ramones founders, with Johnny later confirming the relationship overlap in interviews and his autobiography.

Smashing Pumpkins frontman Billy Corgan and Nirvana’s Kurt Cobain were both romantically involved with Courtney Love. Love has acknowledged past relationships with Corgan before her marriage to Cobain. The shared history added another layer to the already combustible 1990s alternative scene dynamic.

Along with Bebe Buell, Rolling Stones frontman Mick Jagger, and Led Zeppelin guitarist Jimmy Page were also among the many musicians romantically linked to Pamela Des Barres. The list doesn't stop there. In the '60s and '70s, Pamela Des Barres chronicled her relationships with multiple rock icons in her memoir I’m With the Band, offering firsthand accounts of the 1960s and ’70s groupie culture.

Kate Hudson has had serious relationships with a list that reads like a Hollywood Who's Who. She has children by Chris Robinson of the Black Crowes and Matt Bellamy of Muse. Hudson said in a 2021 interview with InStyle, "The reason I connect so deeply with musicians ... is because we all connect to music in a way that you don't have to explain. You just feel it, and it's something you love."

Tunnel buddies may be slang, but the shared partners of rock’s biggest names tell a larger story. The music industry, especially in its ’60s through ’90s heyday, functioned like an ecosystem. The same clubs, studios, managers, and tours meant the same social circles. Add fame, youth, and nonstop travel, and history inevitably repeats itself.

It’s messy. It’s human. And in many cases, it inspired some unforgettable music.