The Greatest Parenting Advice From Eleanor
The greatest parenting advice came from Eleanor. Not my Mom or Dad. Not Dr. Phil or some self-help book. It came from a single lunch meeting with Eleanor Josaitis from Focus Hope
Why Am I Writing About This Now?
With Ryan and Heidi expecting their second child I’ve been thinking a lot about what advice to give as the dad of two kids (and one amazing wife Kathi). You can go online and find hundreds of quotes and signs with inspirational stuff about parenting – and that’s wonderful. But it was Eleanor that still rings in my mind.
Eleanor, Stone Soup and Lunch
I was new here in Detroit – working with JJ & Lynne and building the Stone Soup Project cars (small part of the construction, but proud of our work). The charity that year was Focus:Hope and we invited them to meet with JJ and our management team at Capital Grille in Troy (to be honest – cool place, but way out of my league…still though – free steak is free steak, right?)
I had been reading up on Focus Hope and the amazing work they did (and continue to do) – trying to understand what it must’ve been like with Father Cunningham ripping around on his motorcycle in the middle of the riots of ’67 – helping people and being a beacon of light along with Eleanor.
Conversation Turns to Kids
When we got to lunch JJ and the execs from GM and Focus Hope started talking (if you’ve ever been to lunch with JJ, that man can run a room). I was seated next to Eleanor and I immediately got her to describe how Focus Hope came to be, what was it like in the middle of it all, and how they kept going.
She was one of the most engaging people I’ve ever met – and here’s where the conversation turned to a life moment I’ll never forget.
They don’t care
I remember asking her how she kept a work/life balance in the middle of the riots and starting Focus Hope with Father Cunningham. How do you keep that out of your home? Here it comes: Best Parenting Advice Ever from Eleanor on the way!
She gently grabbed my hand and told me…and it still echoes in my brain today: “I’d get to the front door and knock on the brick of our home – leaving it there” her eyes were locked with mine and she squeezed my hands “your kids don’t care what you do for a living, the just want YOU to be part of their lives”.
Advice for Ryan
That’s my advice for Ryan as he dives into parenthood: Your kids don’t care what you do for a living. They love you because you’re PART of their lives. Enjoy the moments. Listen when you want to talk over them. Ask questions about their day.
Knock on the brick when you get home.
You got this…your friend,
Jim
