Memorial Day – Understanding and Remembering
So on Memorial Day do we only honor those who died during wartime? What about people who passed away after they got off active duty? As a Veteran (eight years U.S. Naval Submarine Service), I was always confused about this…here’s what I found.
Memorial Day is honoring…
Is Memorial Day just to honor and remember those who died during times of war? Or anyone who passed away before (or after) active duty?
According to the VA
Memorial Day, which is observed on the last Monday in May, was originally set aside as a day for remembering and honoring military personnel who died in the service of their country, particularly those who died in battle or as a result of wounds sustained in battle.
The National Moment of Remembrance encourages all Americans to pause wherever they are at 3 p.m. local time on Memorial Day for two minutes of silence to remember and honor those who have died in service to the nation.
Remembering The Heroes on Memorial Day
Over 1 million Americans have died during wartime military service (close to 700,000 in combat – according to the VA back in 2017).
And then you start thinking about the families and friends, suddenly that one million becomes so much more. I’d highly recommend reading the book “Flags Of Our Fathers” (they made a movie about it, but the book dives into the men who raised the flag on Iwo Jima so much deeper). It’s about a family discovering their dad was one of the men who was photographed raising the flag on Iwo Jima, and the subsequent fund raising tours in the states that led to incredible guilt for leaving his friends behind.
But one of the bigger themes in how they dealt with loss – seeing their friends gone in battle. Then trying to process it when they got home. It’s amazing insight to a time of tremendous loss and mental anguish for so many people. When someone says “the ultimate sacrifice” you can look at that generation and start to understand what that means.
The Silent Service And The Cold War
My dad served during Korea as an Army Ranger, he never talked alot about it – but I knew it wasn’t easy. Occasionally he’d talk about his friends and mention how one time they wound up way too far north (practically in China). But I was young and didn’t know how to ask the questions I’d love to ask today (I lost my Dad when I was 23).
I spent four years onboard the USS John C Calhoun (SSBN-630), making six nuclear deterrent patrols (about a year of my life underwater) in the height of the cold war. Was it stressful? Yes. We were very aware of what was at stake, and dealing with the Russians was a full time job.
I think back to the married men on the boat – leaving their families to serve our country. The tremendous sacrifices made by their families back home. The submarine service lost men during the cold war (google the USS Scorpion), plus many (too many) men during the incredibly complex operation of a submarine. I’ll remember those men as well on Memorial Day.
Memorial Day – Celebrate or Mourn?
I think a better way to look at it is to honor those who gave their lives to provide what we have today. What’s that famous quote: “This nation will remain the land of the free so long as it’s the home of the brave”.
Grill your burgers and spend time with family and friends. Drink a beer or two and raise a glass to the men and women who made that ultimate sacrifice. Think about the families who lost so much.
They gave all so we could be where we are today. And I think they’d pretty upset if we simply sat around and mourned all day. Take time at 3pm to remember. Put your flags up at half mast. Maybe set an extra plate for them and leave it out.
Our Veterans are the best of us. They gave (and continue to give) all to this country. Memorial Day is to remember those who made that ultimate sacrifice and kept us free. God bless the men and women in our military. God bless the families who lost all.
God Bless America.