What Were You Thinking? Howell Edition
Dumbest shoplifter ever? Picture this: Last weekend, in the dazzling aisles of Walmart near Howell, we had the annual “Shop With a Cop” extravaganza. You know, the one where police and kids become shopping buddies to spread some holiday cheer. Here’s the report from Fox 2
Now, Lt. Rene Gonzalez, the maestro of Michigan State Police, shared the scoop: “We bring these kids, who might not have had a jolly Christmas otherwise, to the store. They get a cool $100 or maybe even a $150 gift card to unleash their inner shopping spree with the fam.”
So, there they were—state troopers and police, lights flashing, sirens wailing, making a grand entrance. But hold onto your shopping carts, because this 62-year-old shopping ninja couldn’t care less. She went all in, loaded her cart with a whopping $730 worth of goodies, and sprinted through self-checkout like a holiday ninja on a mission.
“Groceries, clothes, the whole shebang,” chuckled Lt. Gonzalez. “Nothing was bagged up, and off she went, strolling out of the store like she owned the place.”
Now, here’s the kicker: She completely ghosted the clerk’s requests for a receipt, breezed past, and guess where she parked her getaway sleigh? Right next to a police cruiser! Talk about the universe playing a festive prank. Dumbest shoplifter ever?
So, there you have it, a holiday caper at Walmart, starring a seasoned shopper and her unbagged loot, right under the noses of the “Shop With a Cop” crew. Now, that’s what I call a Christmas heist, brought to you by the one and only Walmart Chronicles!
Maybe she figured she could just sneak out and no one would notice? I’m pretty sure this story won’t make “Dateline NBC”…but it’s still pretty wild.
So is this the most relaxed criminal ever? We could have another winner here